Kyros

The eldest of the brothers, Kyros, nicknamed Key, is the leader, the final say on every decision made by the Mephisto. He likes growing things and working with the earth. If he’s not on a takedown, he’s usually in his greenhouse. Key is serious, reserved, and even-tempered. Except when he’s not.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

Happiness isn’t perfect. It can’t be.

Which historical figure do you most identify with?

I knew most historical figures before they bought it, and I don’t identify with any of them.

Which living person do you most admire?

The Fruitcake Lady. What?  She died?  Okay, then, I guess I most admire Oprah. Or that guy on the mattress commercials. Hell, I dunno. I’m not into admiring people.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

I’m a pessimistic fatalist. So shoot me – when you’ve seen as much of the dark side as I have, it’s only natural to assume the worst.

What is your favorite journey?

To my greenhouse. It’s quiet out there, and smells like life.

What do you consider the most overrated virtue?

Chastity. Or maybe sobriety. No, it’s probably frugality. Spend it now – you can’t take it with you. Really. I know.

On what occasion do you lie?

Pretty much any occasion.

What do you dislike most about your appearance?

Why would I dislike my appearance?  It’s not as if I have to look at myself.

Which living person do you most despise?

My father’s oldest son, Eryx.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?

Next question.

When and where were you happiest?

The night Phoenix found Jane, at a ball in London in 1887. She wasn’t for me, but if any of us finds an Anabo, it’s cause for celebration.

Which talent would you most like to have?

I would like to laugh at things my brothers find funny, but I just don’t get the humor.

If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?

My father’s oldest son would drop dead.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?

Getting over the death of Eryx. Yes, I know he’s not dead because he’s immortal, but he’s dead to me. He was my older brother and we were close. Now he’s my greatest enemy. That’s messed up and it took a long time to get over it.

If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be?

After being here a thousand years, if I had to come back…well, I just wouldn’t. Been here, done it, bought the t-shirt.

If you could choose what to come back as, what would it be?

Look, I already told you – I’m not coming back.

What is your most treasured possession?

A sketch my mother made of my baby brother, Denys, just before she died.

What is your most marked characteristic?

Besides being a giant?  Probably a green thumb. Plants do amazing things for me when I ask them to.

Who are your favorite writers?

Doesteyvsky and Dickens. Dudes had a way of telling it like it is.

Who is your favorite hero of fiction?

Rochester in Jane Eyre. Okay, so it’s a chick book. He saw what he wanted and went for it – screw that he already had a wife. She was crazy. Jane made him a better man. Well, later, I guess, after the wackjob wife burned the house down and offed herself.

What is it that you most dislike?

Is this different than what I despise most?  I guess I’m not crazy about hypocrites. Oh, and I loathe apples.

What is your motto?

As of now, it’s Don’t answer questionnaires.

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